…..I am listening to Dr. Dan and I am thinking holy cow, this does not sound good. Physical therapy, heat and ice alternating. Oh Man, this is bad.

Do you think it is my knee, or my hip or maybe a shoulder or elbow? Oh no, it is my jaw. Yes, my jaw is overworked and in distress. Chip’s dream come true: less talking, resting it and sadly for me a soft food diet. Maybe I can lose that last 9 pounds.

I have been having trouble with my jaw. I have had trouble since I was in high school. One time my jaw was stuck shut and the dentist sprayed a cold spray of some sort and it released– just like that.  It has been creeping up lately and when Chip could hear the clicking sound from my right side, I thought it was time to see someone.

Dr. Dan was great.  He is kind and caring and wants to help. He is a specialist and saw me at 5:30 last night.  By the time I left at 7:45pm, I was tired and sore and somewhat depressed that my “type A personality” landed me here.  My physical therapy for this poor jaw includes relaxation and yoga for God’s sake! Dr. Dan doesn’t know me very well.

I told him I was very relaxed in Fredrick driving back from White Plains when I passed that Trooper at 86mph.  I looked over at the Trooper, which I never do as a rule and was treated to a very simple shake of his head “no.” Message received and I was calm.

I am relaxed when I wake every morning at 4:40 to go to the gym and take a Spin class. I remain relaxed as I pack up the kids for crew (with Chip) take them to the river, drive back, shower, work and the day begins. I am relaxed d#*m it!

I am NOT relaxed that I have to ice my face three times a day and practice making the “n” sound to teach my jaw how to relax.  Can’t this be accomplished with a delightful single malt or a large glass of Pinot Grigio?  I believe it can, but I have not attended medical or dental school.

So I will rest my jaw and look to the heavens to whomever it was that Chip prayed to in order for his gift and beg for forgiveness.  Was giving up cheese not enough? Is it not a lesson seeing my hair grow like a Chia Pet in this humidity? I feel a spasm coming on….oh Lord, where is the ice pack?